Okay..
It has been a while since my last swearing..
And here it goes...

I was in a good mood...
But till 5 mins ago...
I turned into a devil...
A real mad devil!

I tried to accept that it's okay for others to drink...
I kept telling myself... "It's okay... No harm drinking, as long as they still do the right thing."
But I can't convince myself anymore.
I'm better off alone than carrying on thing like this.

If only you know how much time Mr-X has spent with me in the past, you would have said that I am becoming more independent.
I didn't want it to be mine all the time...
I am just asking for a lil time to do some talking but I was told that I am very annoying and others need time for holiday.
But farker!! I was not the one who called, ok?
Okay.. Since you, the farking friend said that I'm so annoying and if he agreed too....
Then ok... It is my fault again.

I try not to be an anti-drinking freak but now, I have to.
I hate those bloody idiots that are drunk and start saying hurtful words or even fight.

I'm sorry!!
I'm hurt...
and I hate myself for being such a bitch.
But I do want my self-respect.

I don't want life like that anymore.
Please don't make me stay if you are not standing by me and you are not trying to understand me.
I absolutely need one that is willing to stand by me no mater what happen in the future.
I absolutely need one that is willing to trust me!